Arendelle’s GoFundMe Link for Recovery

Discussion in 'Anything Goes' started by Arendelle, Feb 9, 2018.

  1. Arendelle

    Arendelle Well-Known Member

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    Click here to support Megan's Cult Recovery Treatment organized by Megan Douglass

    Family and Friends,

    So my health has plummeted again (still). I’m being strongly encouraged/pushed to go into residential living treatment. I don’t disagree with the recommendation, I just don’t have a clue how I’m going to afford it. It’s literally kept me up all freaking night thinking it over.
    I’ve been thinking that robbing a bank sounds like a better and better idea, or maybe stripping! At least that’s legal. I wonder how long it takes to make $100 k as a prostitute? J/K
    I was always taught to save then spend, but this reminds me a lot of the kind of debt a lot of ppl get into going to college. (I.E. you can’t really get on with your life without it and you will NEVER get it first practically).
    If you have any ideas (or even could donate/contribute a small amount to help) please let me know.
    What I ‘m doing /have done so far....
    -Sell my Disney timeshare (cry)
    -Sell all my Disney Collectables (mostly pins, including my entire personal collection, which was significant) sob
    -Ask the facility for a reduced rate based on financial need (They actually agreed! They cut the daily rate from $1,950 daily to $700 or initially it will drop again to $515 once my level of care changes (everyone starts on the highest level until they can prove yoy dont require that. Im really hoping I can move to the lower level in in 2-3 weeks.
    -Search the web/make phonecalls about grants and/or scholarships available to pay for treatment. Thus far, Ive met a number of nice people but unless I have an active eating disorder or am struggling with an addiction or a small handfull of other very specific issues, (so far) no go.
    So I’ve decided to try to reach out to the support I do have. As you may know, I had a traumatic and unique upbringing (I was raised in a cult from which I was rescued at 22) which is what has caused my severe and disabling issues that has caused me to most recently lose my full-time job with Disney, lose my apartment, and become very physically sick for psychologically based reasons. I have always and currently still am unsuccessful in developing relationships (especially intimate ones), maintaining stable housing, or keeping a job (even part-time). I struggle as ordinary items, sights, sounds, and smells will trigger me and send me into a “flight or fight” mode, I have night terrors that torment me nightly and cause me to greet the morning worn out mentally and physically. the emotions I experience, I experience to a much greater intensity than most causing the pain to sear deeper and the highs to be higher and these mountains and valleys make for a wild ride with an unwilling rider. I’m one of the most caring, empathetic people I know, but I struggle with boundaries because of my past abuse and my feeling responsible for others feelings. This causes the lines between you and me to blur, but then I over analyze everything and assume your mad at me or don’t want me around and to protect myself from forcing you to tell me these things, I create space between us, and pretty soon, I honestly don’t know if we are friends and we haven’t talk in months or years. These are just the top layer of my many trauma-based issues. Yes, sure, I’ve been given labels, but I believe that’s all they are, names. I’m still Megan. I still want to be the best version on myself and set goals and do everything I can to overcome, because, I know I can be an overcomer.
    I’ve been battling my demons for over 20 years now and Im so ready to put the past behind me and move on but I have tried so hard on my own and with the private counselor in a once weekly out patient setting and almost nothing has changed. I went to this facility (Pasadena Villa) last July for two months, and I progressed, changed, learned more than I have the in rest of the last 20 years combined.
    So as you can imagine, Being given the opportunity to go back is not something I want to miss. This is not an incredibly comfortable place to be, and I work hard every day (Its much like being in college).
    I feel bad talking about my money problems with friends and family, but I really dont know what else to do, where else to go.
    if you would like to contribute something (honestly, no amount is too small, I am emmensely grateful!) You can send the money directly to the facility, That way, if you would like to help you know the money is 100% going where you want it to be going.
    Thanks again for letting me talk and if nothibg else, get my thoughts on paper, so to speak. I really appreciate ALL the support you give in so many ways. Thank you for being there. Whether that’s a one-time financial assistance, a monthly help while I’m in treatment, a letter or card with a word of encouragement, or even just your prayers or a positive thought in my direction. I truly am grateful for the role each of you had in my life so far and look forward to reuniting when we get the chance.

    If you want to mail me something,
    Just PM me for my address

    Funds can be sent by check or credit card. Be sure to clarify they are for Megan Douglass’ account so they will go where they are supposed to go. They bill monthly so if you would like to contribute something to each month’s bill I would be most grateful.
    Their contact information is:

    Beth McGahee
    Pasadena Villa Residential Treatment Centers
    407.839-9066 Cell
    877.845.5235 Admissions Line
    407.329.3300 Secure Fax

    I’m done hiding in the shadows. Time does not heal all wounds. I would love to hear from you, PM me if you would like to text or email.

    Feel free to forward this message on if you think someone else may be interested in helping get my life back and reclaiming it as my own.

    Attached you will find two of my most recent artistic efforts, one was just for fun in honor of Valentines Day, the other is my first attempt to start being able to tell my story in a non-threatening, relatable, yet non-compromising way. Enjoy!


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2018
  2. coblj003

    coblj003 DPF Charter Member DPF Correspondent

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    I'm sorry to hear everything that has happened thus far. While I cannot send monetary support at this time, know that my thoughts and prayers are with you.
  3. watzshakinbacon

    watzshakinbacon B for Belle or B for bacon?

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    Sorry to hear all this. How terrible :[

    msg sent.
  4. pretty Omi

    pretty Omi Resident Smol Wolf

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    What about creating a Go Fund Me page? Lots of people will just contribute to random causes, but it might make it easier to share your story online and get some extra support.
  5. Xanaduhaz

    Xanaduhaz Clinically Pinsane

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    I am so sorry that you are going through such a tough time, I unfortunately can't offer money being in UK and little money but if you set up a go fund me or something a might be able to send a little but I can relate to your story I too have a lt of mental health issues and have never had a job because of it and though I live with my parents for safety reasons it has started to be mentioned I should try supported living so if you ever want to talk or vent about anything send me a message.
  6. Loomi

    Loomi Active Member

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    Im so sorry to hear of your troubles and difficulties. You have been incredible to come this far and I wish you the very best for the future ahead <3 I too am in the UK so donating directly to the facility isn't possible for me, but I would be happy to donate to a Go Fund Me or something, should you decide to make one!
  7. Purplemandms

    Purplemandms Like the candy!

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    Sending support, pixie dust, and hopefully a bit of hope for the future. I've had several friends who have gone through live-in treatment programs, and they have told me that, just like an education, it is an investment in your future and a foundation to build upon. If I hear of any grants going through my psych department here at UF, I will let you know.

    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  8. Kiragigi

    Kiragigi Active Member

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    I am so sorry, Megan. There are some groups that offer financial and psychological assistance to former cult members/escapees. I know that some are specific to certain cults, but there are others like reFOCUS, EnCourage, and ICSA (international cultic studies association) that provide both financial and psychological assistance to any cult victim. Go fund me is a great idea, too.
    Please pm me your email/snail mail. I’d be honored to be a cheerleader for you in your journey.

    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
  9. Arendelle

    Arendelle Well-Known Member

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    91   1   0

    You all have provided some great ideas and insight. Thanks so much!
    I plan to start a go fund me page, which feels daunting and scary, but I think it’s the right thing to do. I’ve always been pretty shy with my battle and for a large number of years I was hiding from my family of origin because I didn’t know what they would do if they found me (although I knew it wouldn’t be pleasant). I am no longer afraid of them, and I’ve been feeling like I’ve been wanting the power that comes from sharing my story for a number of months now.
    I have to admit, just sharing as much with you all as I did was a huge step for me, but like I said before, I am determined to get my life back, not be the victim, recover, heal, and have a healthy and productive life. I truly believe this is possible. We can break the chains of abuse and if the Beast could learn to love and be loved, maybe it’s possible for me too. Even Elsa is learning that love can control fear, despite the powerful destructiveness we see that fear took in her life, so there’s hope for me. Well, I want to ask Joy to be my witty companion on this journey and would love to have as many of you join me as I can also! Who’s in?

    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  10. Arendelle

    Arendelle Well-Known Member

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    Here is a poem I wrote about myself a few days ago.

    Who am I?

    I am one of many.
    I am often unheard.

    Sometimes I have felt important.
    More often invisible.

    I am often told to “Speak Up!”
    But when I do, I’m told to be honest and this is not how it happened.
    Instead what they should say is
    “Speak what you were Taught.”

    Sometimes I’m allowed to talk about the past briefly
    Then I’m reprimanded for letting my mind wander and reminded
    “It’s not that way anymore”
    No - They are right, But why do I still dream of it every night?

    I’m told “Be bold, be true to yourself!”
    How is this possible after being raised to hide my very thoughts and feelings?
    To always act as if I understand exactly what is happening and smile regardless
    Believing that “faking it” is in fact working, while in my head, I’m scrambling.

    Alone people will be my friend, hold my hand
    Together, my secrets are just too dark, the truths denied, I am alone.

    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  11. starry_solo

    starry_solo Judge of the Dark Court Staff Member DPF Super Moderator

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    Do you not qualify for your state's equivalent of Medicaid? Have you contacted social security to see if you can get social security disability benefits?
  12. Arendelle

    Arendelle Well-Known Member

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    watzshakinbacon likes this.
  13. watzshakinbacon

    watzshakinbacon B for Belle or B for bacon?

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    123   0   0

  14. Arendelle

    Arendelle Well-Known Member

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    91   1   0

    Thanks! Good Idea!

    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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