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I need advice about trading etiquette.

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I need advice about trading etiquette.
Molly

Molly

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Hello all, I have a quick question about trading etiquette. I am fairly new here and have recently posted my first offer to trade PODM pins. I received a PM (*see below) and I may be new to this forum but I know how to count (fingers, toes etc.) and this offer was downright offensive to me. I have seen other posts that said offers to only be made in the forum but I know that some people are shy or do not want to be embarrassed if their offer sucks or whatever and may really want to send PM's. I am not sure if asking for public offers only is considered rude however I do not want to wade through PMs of this type which are like the (almost criminal) offers I get sent through Pinpics.

Any advice will help greatly as I really do not want to offend anyone but I do not want to be sent ludicrous offers either. I cannot help but feel insulted and I think I may have been a bit snappy in my response (sorry if you are the person that sent it) and I really don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

Thanks!


*Hello,
I'm interested in your Tangled PODM. Would you be interested in trading for these:

Pin 90874: Stylized Disney Princess Designer Shoes Booster Set - Complete Set

Please let me know. Feel free to take a look at my other traders as well. No hurt feelings if you say no.


 
If I don't like the offer someone sends I just try to counter offer and work something out. If nothing catches my eye I simply say thank you for the offer, but I'm going to hold on to my pin. Some people just try to give stuff that the person might like, but don't really pay attention to edition size and stuff. Or they could just be a new trader.
 
If they're new, they might not know the value. To them they might think that the booster set is worth equal value.
At the same time, because you're new they might try to under trade you.
Just know that in your pin trading lifetime, there will always be offers that are waaaaaay under the pin that they want to trade for. You should just either go through their wants and make a counter offer or just politely decline :)
 
I can't believe you would put this on a forum for everyone that knows me and embarass me like this. How dare you! Everyone pin trader is different and values pins in a different way. I simply made an offer off of YOUR wants list. Wether you thought it was ridicolous, or you felt insulted, you still need to be considerate. I even put at the bottom " No hurt feelings if you say no". And that's all you had to say and I would have thanked you for your consideration. I even said please look at my other traders. It was not my intent to low-ball you. A person may value the shoes higher because they can't get them and would be willing to trade. Every person is different. Even I have had insane trade offers, but at least I have the common courtesy to say "No thank you. Not at this time." I don't send an insulting PM and cut the person down and then embarass them on the forum!!!! And the majority of people I have traded with and made trade offers know this is me you are talking aboout cause I usually end my trade offers with "No hurt feelings if you say no." That was all you had to say. You need to learn some forum etiquette!
 
Ok ..yes I agree this should not have been on the DPF discussion forum..you should of said"NO thanks"and moved on....never call anybody out on it
if the pin they were offering was on your want list ....I can see where they would send a PM..yes please be kind in trading,I get some really strange offers but I never
would call them out on it right here on the forum...I would just say no thanks,thanks for the offer and maybe next time..Be careful next time,as feelings do get hurt
 
tiggermickey said:
Ok ..yes I agree this should not have been on the DPF discussion forum..you should of said"NO thanks"and moved on....never call anybody out on it
if the pin they were offering was on your want list ....I can see where they would send a PM..yes please be kind in trading,I get some really strange offers but I never
would call them out on it right here on the forum...I would just say no thanks,thanks for the offer and maybe next time..Be careful next time,as feelings do get hurt
Click to expand...

+10000 Well said Judy
 
tiggermickey said:
Ok ..yes I agree this should not have been on the DPF discussion forum..you should of said"NO thanks"and moved on....never call anybody out on it
if the pin they were offering was on your want list ....I can see where they would send a PM..yes please be kind in trading,I get some really strange offers but I never
would call them out on it right here on the forum...I would just say no thanks,thanks for the offer and maybe next time..Be careful next time,as feelings do get hurt
Click to expand...


Thank you! :)
 
Tangled PODM $24.95 vs. Designer Princess shoes $29.95 sounds like a fair "initial" asking trade, a starting point or set up for a potential trade. I understand that the PODM have gone up in price depending on the scene but #1MickeyFreak did ask to look at other traders as well. I have traded Tangled PODM's in the past for pins I wanted at similiar to designer shoes.

If one wants to do the trade they move forward on the trade and if one doesn't then one just kindly declines...now that is proper forum etiquette.
 
I think in general we need to think of positive intent.

Molly- I know your new and I totally get it but I think you could have looked at it as a positive intent situation. Maybe this other trader also had no real clue on what it is worth? They also did state, no hurt feelings. So my suggestion is to think from a positive point of view over a negative. It is very helpful in situations like this. Your post was a bit harsh and I can see why this trader lashed out on here. The one thing you will learn in this hobby is that you will always get a ridiculous offer at some point. I can almost say daily on pin pics for me but I have to look at it to where they may not know the value etc etc. the big thing here is to know you will always get random offers and you gotta stay positive especially if you do not know this trader. So chin up. We all have been in that boat. Hope that helps. I know you possibly came on here thinking this is a way to figure out opinions which I get but next time you can possible rephrase it in a nicer manner ;)

#1mickeyfreak- I totally can understand why you wrote what you wrote on here. I get it but again back to my positive intent speech. We can see Molly joined on Oct 2012 and only has 45 posts. Not saying they went about it the right way but maybe they are so new they truly were seeking help and assuming your intentions? Again, I totally get it but maybe next time you could message them and explain things before posting on here? Chin up. You seem fabulous and amazing.

Miscommunication and assumptions can really change a situation. I think the two of you need to message each other or chat room it out. The pin community is small. I hope you both can find it in yourselves to try and look from the other person's perspective and work it out. I can see you both felt hurt and understand why but I think you both have good intentions in this situation but miscommunication and not talking it out can lead to situations like this. Always wishing the best! xoxo.
 
Okay, here is my perspective.

#1mickeyfreak - I think you freaked out a little bit. Unless the OP posted your name in the initial thread (which I didn't see at all), no one was calling you out on a trade. The OP was looking for advice on the forum (which if you look at the history of "pin discussion" there has been a thread about lopsided offers, etc.).

Now, I am looking at this from the perspective of a "newbie" (I share sis' pinpics account so people may think I am a "newbie" but I am not). We just combine for ease of reference, otherwise we'd have to constantly look at each others' accounts to see what each person has in her collection.

As a "newbie," I'd probably value my Tangled PODM higher than the shoes BUT I would have no problem sending out the offer with a note to say "please look at my other traders" (like #1mickeyfreak apparently did). I know my sis sends out lopsided offers ALL the time with a note to say, willing to trade multiple pins/look at my other traders through Pinpics. Pinpics doesn't give you the opportunity to customize your offer to one person (it would be nice if it was done). She hopes people take her PinPics offer as a way to open negotiations.

To the OP, did you go look at the trader's other pins in his trades list? If so and you didn't find anything else, then you can thank them for the offer and say "no thanks." If you didn't, maybe you should go look to see and counter-offer if there are other pins in his trader's list that you like.

Those are my thoughts. Take them or leave them.
 
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