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Is it worth the infraction???

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Is it worth the infraction???
Goofy_Moe

Goofy_Moe

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Is it worth the infraction...???

When a member totaly pisses you off and you want the Pin Trading world to know what type a character this person is... Do you stop to think of the possible ramifications that you will receive before posting the rant thread??? or does this ever even come into mind and does the anger of the moment drive you to make the post??? I have made the sudden over reaction in the past and quickly realized my mistake and posted a very big apology after doing so and then I suspended myself from the forum for two days...LOL... But now I do everything I can to bite my tongue at times and not post comments as others will usually post what I am feeling anyway... So now when I do feel angry or frustrated, I actually think about my past experience and it prevents me from ranting... Well that is up till now... I am struggling with this very decision... It is a festuring anger that boils from within, unlike the snap reaction from my prior outburst... I bite my tongue and let it go, a couple days or maybe a week and it happens again... wait wait... then again... Whatever it is that may get under your skin this person keeps doing... You say something via PM that hopefully will end things politely and in a diplomatic way... then again... Now I am not talking something like seeing a fellow trader trading scrappers to cast members and guest... I am talking something that goes completely against one of my main beliefs I hold most precious... the children... and how I feel this hobby should be mostly about them and the things we can do to make it better for them... But when someone completely tries to manipulate another member by use of a childs wishes when they know that member would do anything for a child is... Messed Up (Had to avoid the infraction there, not what I wanted to say)... I am soo completely torn as to what to do, and now that I am posting this, it can be viewed as Pre-Meditated Ranting and may increase my penalties...

Any suggestions on how I can get beyond this without getting into trouble or do I just take the infraction... let it all out and deal with the concequences of the rant afterwards...
 
I think the kind of the ranting you just did isn't too bad. But if it's that much of an issue with a member, talk to a mod, see if they can do anything. Otherwise, tell the people you think should know (privately) or if someone honestly inquires. No one can get along with everyone all the time, but forum drama makes lots of people unhappy.

Deep breath, you are strong and adult enough to deal with it. :)
 
I personally would rant to someone you know and trust privately, get their take on it and see if anything can be done to change what's bothering you by going through the 'proper channels'. Exhaust all other options before resorting to a public rant and ask yourself, will a public rant actually change anything? You can always talk to me moe, feel free to rant all you'd like. Heck we can meet up and you can rant in person! I'll bring the popcorn! ;) *big hugs*
 
I bite my tongue all the time. I have a plethora of inner thoughts that never make it into posts, but it isn't the potential infraction that stops me. It is that it isn't worth it. Occasionally I cave and comment on a heated topic (again, not saying all that I'd like to say) but quickly get bored and tired of it and leave. There are many other things that are far more worthy of a passionate fight.
 
If you're not speaking in the heat of the moment and are still upset after thinking it over then unload what you're feeling. This whole infarction thing is a little ridiculous anyways.
 
Ugh, sorry to hear this. It's hard to make the decision on whether to air out the laundry or to step back and just get some air and some distance. That's something that's completely up to you. Good luck though. I'm sure you'll figure out the best way to proceed and get through this. :hug:
 
I agree with Echo and Erica. It's not the infraction. It's that the lengthy drama just isn't worth it, and that the public rant probably isn't going to change anything.

I'd talk to mods; if they can't do anything to make it stop, rant privately to friends and mute the member in question so you don't have to see them anymore.
 
first, Moe, that was a very diplomatic rant. Well said without indicating who you are upset with. Next, you said in your OP that you have PM'd this person? (whew, not me. lol ) When someone keeps doing something that bugs you and it cannot be resolved... theres this awesome feature here on DPF... It's called IGNORE MEMBER. Rocking feature! I have one or two people set to ignore.

Now, you know me, I know you, I love you and your family, but I am gonna play a tiny bit of devils advocate. Not because I disagree with you, but because sometimes, people do dumb things, and I might shed some light on this ones motivation.

Your comment:: "... But when someone completely tries to manipulate another member by use of a childs wishes when they know that member would do anything for a child is... Messed Up (Had to avoid the infraction there, not what I wanted to say)... I am soo completely torn as to what to do..."

I often remark that this pin or that pin is for my childs collection. Granted, I dont generally want high dollar high value pins for my 2 girls, at PTN's or at the park trading, if I see something for their collections, I mention it. I do NOT expect people to just hand over a pin simply because its for my child. I expect to trade for it. I actually even get a bit confused when folks hand me a pin (for myself or the kids) and dont want anything for it. Perhaps this person is like me, but doesnt realize that they are asking for too much? For instance, I would NEVER tell someone "ohhhh, I love that PODM! It fits my daughters princess collection perfectly!" Perhaps this person does not realize that they are "useing" the kids to get nice pins.

Just because its "for the kids" doesnt mean you have to give them Designer villains, or PODM's or DA LE100's or whatever. ok. done with that thought.

As to being worth the infraction: The infraction system was put in place (my theory) to stop people from doing stoopid silly wrong things. Such as extreme name calling, bickering, call out posts, and stuf having to do with the auctions and sales threads. Its there for a reason. But as careful, kind and honest as you are, I doubt you will ever actually earn an infraction. In fact, your so careful, to be hinest, if you felt the need to do something that earned an infraction... I bet it would be worth it. :)
 
Hey Moe!

As your good friend. I would advise leaning towards the side of caution. Remember, posting a rant thread makes us just as bad as the other people who have posted crazy rants!. Although it may feel good in the beginning, I think after you posted it you might feel different. A rant to bash another member kinda means "you've stooped" to that persons level. Just try to keep it within the PM's. Remember, you've got a bunch of people here on DPF that support you and think you are a great person. You can always PM us as well if you ever needed to vent or just talk about certain things. Take care my friend!

BoB & Cat
 
Moe,

I know you need to vent. We all get there. I am so that kind of person. When I am pissed off I say everything under the sun then after am like okay... Maybe I didn't mean everything I said but... I was pissed and it was the heat but in the end it is best to vent to a close person like Rebecca or a friend. This is something that is best for you in the end. The pin community is pretty small. We see each other all the time and if it is a local, its not worth it. Just agree to disagree and just move on. Just don't talk to the person or have anything to do with that person. Moe, you are loved and appreciated so much on the forum and to me, as a friend, id do anything I could for you and Rebecca. Just keep your chin up and know in the end you have a ton of support behind you Goon.

xoxo.

Princess of the Goons :)
 
From what i got out of your nasty rant:p was that they are trading in parks and in person by using scrappers and pulling on heart strings for their kid? If this is correct than it really does not have much to do with this forum, you'll never change the person THEY ARE. They know they are scamming , which is the same as stealing and that is their character. A-holes--dont trade with them and the good OL stink eye can be quite satisfying!

I have had a trade dispute with a person on here and they just diappeared --owing me 3 LE UK pins, since July11th...man do i wanna slatter their name all over, but i just suck it up, believe in Karma (i have to have a ton of good) and move on.
 
from someone that has a BIG Mouth ! :lol: I can honestly admit I have 2 infractions, one for going off on a member, and the other was for closing an auction . I have truly tried to be better and except for one problem, I've been good .
I think your rant was very diplomatic and as other have said, either rant to a very good friend or contact a mod to help out .
I hope you get this straightened out .
Best Magical Wishes & Pixiedust **********************************
 
Oh, I know who this pin scrapper is . :lol: outside of being a member here, after I read your post again . I was thinking of a past member that does this type of thing .
 
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Less work for me = a happy moderator :bigthumb:

Calling a friend and venting on the phone has always worked for me. Well... Not always, but most of the time =P
 
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