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Online Pin Trading Etiquette...Messaging Members for Sales with No Sales Post Posted?

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Online Pin Trading Etiquette...Messaging Members for Sales with No Sales Post Posted?

ElysionsPrincess

Love Thaws a Frozen Heart!
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Hi everyone!

I just wanted to know what everyone's thoughts were on something. Do you think it is in poor taste to message someone here on the forum, asking them to sell something of theirs that they have not listed for sale (whether this be a new release item that said person just acquired or something from their existing collection)? I ask this because I received quite a few messages, I am not saying from who, asking me if I would sell my Designer Couples pin set. Even when I said no, the question still came around. I know I am not the only person that this happened to, and not only for this release.

What do you think? Has this ever happened to you? What do you say or do? How do you feel about it?

I know that sometimes when we really want something, sometimes we go a bit bananas for it. But at what point do you cross the line?

I am NOT trying to call anyone out with this thread or point any fingers. Merely trying to have a conversation about boundaries! If it is deemed inappropriate or becomes too heated, I will request that it is shut down. We don't need no drama up in here! :nono:
 
At one point in my life, I got at least 5 messages (PM and E-MAIL) a day...
asking if I would trade, sell, or even as far as "finding another"
for a certain pin that shall not be named... (Voldemort?)

That's the point where I wanted to snap.
 
I find it hurtful that people would do that if your not wanting to trade or sell pins you want to keep its called harrasment ive not done it to any other traders on here as if not advertising its not for sale and with only having so little pins no one has to me hope this stops soon
 
I think it's okay to ask if it's on their trades list. One time I noticed that another DPF member had a pin I had been searching for in her trades, but I had nothing on her wants. I sent her a message asking if she would consider selling it and she seemed happy to do it. I wouldn't have asked had it not been for trade. Maybe people thought you might be thinking about selling or trading them and just not putting them in your trades so that you don't get 500 trade request emails per day, lol. If you've said "no" and the same people keep messaging you then that is crossing a line, IMO.
 
I could get why people would do it for trader pins. But I think collection pins are kinda rude. When your like omg I finally have it! And someone asks you to sell it to them. I've had it with some of my rare herc merch I just direct people to eBay. If your being contacted over and over by the same person that is out of line.
 

^this. I think it is okay to ask if the pin is up for trade. Of course if the person declined or didnt respond after my first message, i wouldnt ask again. Repeatedly asking would be crossing the line.
 
I'd say asking one time for traders is fine. If they come back after you say NFS with an offer, that is crossing the line in my opinion.

Collection should be off-limits ... I don't even ask for trading for something on an owns list.
 
HandA said:
I'd say asking one time for traders is fine. If they come back after you say NFS with an offer, that is crossing the line in my opinion.

Collection should be off-limits ... I don't even ask for trading for something on an owns list.
Click to expand...

Jason for prez! Yes, this

On second thoughts .. if anyone would like to gift me some grail pins from their collection, I'd graciously accept :rofl:

You and your jelly arms "earned" those pins Alex. I am happy for you and I am sure they have a wonderful home with you.
 
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I have been watching the "Who got one" discussion thread about the designer couples very closely and I saw how badly you really wanted them for your collection. With that being said, I would never dream of asking you to give it up, unless, it was on your trades list. I find it rude of someone to ask if you would sell/trade from your collection. Your collection is yours "keepers," why would anyone ever ask for to give those up is beyond me. I know there are some people who trade from their collection, but most of us don't, so if it isn't offered don't ask about it because it's off limits.
 
I think it's a bit rude especially if someone asks over and over again. I don't trade from my collection and I wouldn't think to ask someone to trade from their collection either.
 
Me personally, I wouldn't do it unless it was in their Traders. A lot of people are more upfront than me though so I would say as a general rule, it depends on how they ask and if you say no, they should accept it and move on. I think everyone has their price even for things that they really love so people figure it doesn't hurt to ask.
 
if its listed as a trader, I would feel okay to ask if it is for sale. in fact, I did it the other day!

unless I was offered to "check my collection" for trades, I would never think to ask. its in poor taste.

repeated inquiries would lead me to block someone!
 
I don't mind if people PM me about trading or selling pins on my trade list (hey I've made some good trades that way).
In my opinion, if you decline then that needs to be it. If the same person keeps bugging you, then it crosses the line and it's time to block them or notify a mod.
 
I've had someone do that and I wasn't very happy about it. They went through my collection and saw I have the rapunzel compact... They then had the nerve to say well they should have it. That they deserved it cause they were closer to finishing being a tangled completist before me. I was so shocked and offended, but it's hard for
me to be outright rude to someone so I just told them that if they had looked through my collection ( which is the only way to find out I even own the compact) they'd see I am also a tangled collector and that I didn't want to trade one of the hardest tangled pins and be even farther set back. Then I asked if they had messaged anyone else who owned the compact for theirs and they said no just me.
 
I think it crosses the line when people do not take NO for an answer. Real estate agents will go door to door asking people if they would be willing to sell. They do this to generate business, not to be rude. Its not rude until the same one just badgers and badgers you. I have even had car dealers cold call me checking if I want to trade in my car. They weren't rude about it, just trying to drum up business.
 

Holy crap, what?! This is awful.

Also, I'm glad you started this conversation, Alex. I think it's rude to be so aggressive... Asking once, okay, fine. Asking as many times as you had been asked by the same person ... Not fine. I think it's presumptuous and greedy. This comment is laughable. "I'm closer to being a completist than you are!" ... Gross.
 
Seriously!!! It upsets me that another tangled collector would even say that! When you or Hollie get a tangled pin I always congratulate you and are happy that you guys are a step closer! When darris posted he's only one pin away I was truly excited that someone might actually do the impossible and complete it all!!! Every tangled collectors dream.
 
Online Pin Trading Etiquette...Messaging Members for Sales with No Sales Post...

Just imagine some of the PMs I get.

People who keep asking for the same pin, or ask if I would zap them, or make stupid statements get put on my "bad" list, and the chances of me doing anything for them is almost nil.
 
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I try not to send requests to purchase to people unless they have a sales thread up and are obviously open to purchase offers from the trade list. I would NEVER ask someone about buying something from the "owns" list. And if a person does NOT have a sales list up, or the sales list says they are ONLY selling the listed items I will not contact.

The problem you are running into is that there are people out there desperate to get those pins. And when you want something that badly, sometimes better judgement regarding manners gets set aside a tiny bit. Honestly, there is no HARM in asking, but it is a personal preference and many people would be offended if asked to sell something in the owns collection, or something not listed for sale. "You don't know unless you ask" is likely the thought process these folks have, even if you said clearly that the item was not for sale.
 

And this is why you are awesome, and fortune favors awesome, patient and good people. (I keep telling myself that, and it hasn't failed me yet!)

I've been thinking about this a lot, and I wonder if it comes down to an individual's sense of entitlement? In both your example and of Alex's, it seems like the individuals in question feel like they are ENTITLED to a pin or a set because of their contribution to the forum (in whatever capacity they measure it) or how much of a "fan" they deem themselves of the collection. It's a very subjective scale, and I know I get really irked when I hear people say that they "deserve" or "need" a pin because they have a million in their collection and are somehow more important than newer collectors... I don't think tenure in the hobby, money or status/"fame" make you more worthy of a pin than others. (Obligatory reminder that this is targeted at NO ONE IN PARTICULAR and that I think we can all think of a time when we've been guilty of gushing over and "needing" a pin -- I know I have!)

Man, this went really preachy and that wasn't really at all my intention... just my two cents, I guess. Okay, that's the end of my soapbox rant... :wavey:
 
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